Please help with separation anxiety

[Brodie982754]

Hi everyone,

we picked up our puppy last Wednesday so we’ve had him for under a week. We knew leaving him (not for long or even us leaving the house of course) would be challenging but we aren’t seeing any change with the wee guy. We can’t even leave his sight without him howling and even if we leave him for ten minutes he never settles. He is doing so well with everything else but we just can’t make progress with leaving him. He’s always so tired but just won’t settle down but for some reason he sleeps well at night. We are only using positive reinforcement and making sure he has everything he needs, water, food, been to the toilet etc. and we took him to the vet recently to make sure everything was okay. I feel like we are confident in all aspects of their training apart from leaving him alone so I would really appreciate any advice!

 

[JudyN]

It'll probably just take a little longer for him to settle in and feel more confident. After all, just a week ago he was always with his mum and/or siblings and never on his own, now his whole world has changed. For now, let him follow you everywhere, including the loo. Once he stops worrying that he might not be able to get to you, and you won't disappear, he'll eventually be OK snoozing on the sofa while you pop out the room briefly... then you have somewhere to start from.

We have a post about your pup's first few nights here: Your new puppy: the first few nights

And there's more about SA here: Separation anxiety

 

[JoanneF]

I think it's probably helpful not to think of it as separation anxiety - for a puppy, it's perfectly normal behaviour. If it weren't for our interference, puppies would stay with their mothers and siblings for a lot longer than the eight week stage that we remove them.

At this stage, the most important thing is building his confidence, and building your bond, because that's what will give him the courage he needs to thrive alone. So letting him see that you are there to take care of everything is a big part of doing that at the start. At this age, it's fine to practically wear your puppy!

After another week or so, the Flitting Game developed by Emma Judson is a good place to start - https://www.thecanineconsultants.co.uk/post/flitting-game-in-full-extra-shiny

 

[Brodie982754]

Thank you guys, I really appreciate your advice. It's so hard because we just want to do what is best for him. I guess what we want to avoid is him becoming to dependent on us, would giving him constant attention not encourage this? We are using short-term and long-term confinement while he is still young and learning

 

[JudyN]

The thing is, you can only raise him to feel secure as an adult if he feels secure as a pup, and at the moment, when you leave him he doesn't feel secure - his world is scary at times. It's just like human babies - we used to leave them in their cots to 'cry it out' (and exercise their lungs...), but now we know that this isn't the best way to raise a child.

 

[Brodie982754]

The thing is, you can only raise him to feel secure as an adult if he feels secure as a pup, and at the moment, when you leave him he doesn't feel secure - his world is scary at times. It's just like human babies - we used to leave them in their cots to 'cry it out' (and exercise their lungs...), but now we know that this isn't the best way to raise a child.

That makes so much sense, thank you Judy