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Ugly Bitch

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Whippets Rule

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isn't she though? (w00t)

this is Zoe..or "Moonpig" or "Ming" or "Cowbag" or "Baggage" depending on her behaviour on any given day...she's pretty horrid bless her...she hates kids...she hates other dogs....she hates most people.....she has to be muzzled when on her lead because she's such an evil witch...she spends most of her time, when at home, whining,mooing and grunting and growling and complaining until we could cheerfully throttle her.

our old boxer dog was such a love... but this thing as just :rant: (w00t) :lol: :lol: :wub:

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she steals veg from the veg rack and we often find mushrooms and tomatoes carefully placed under the rug with beds and toys piled on top.... a bit like the mountain in the living room in Close Encounters of the Third Kind (w00t)
 
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She's not ugly :rant: ...she may be all the other things :unsure: - I don't know :blink: - but she's not ugly :( - she's beautiful :wub: :wub: :wub:
 
PMSL, who needs tv with posts like this, ang on a min tho, its footy on tv innit, Holland n Russia, bugger it im stayin put :lol:
 
Only a mother could love a face like that, what a dear, she looks so sweet!!!!!!!!!!!! :b
 
midlanderkeith said:
PMSL, who needs tv with posts like this, ang on a min tho, its footy on tv innit, Holland n Russia, bugger it im stayin put :lol:
Click to expand...

stop it she doesn't need encouragement (w00t) she torments my rabbits with her attempts to suck them through the bars on the run like some giant hairy vacuum cleaner. :lol:

we've come home to a mess as though a chef has had a seizure in the middle of my kitchen, whilst cooking a casserole....ie veg, meat, gravy granules...everywhere including up the walls...a whole bag of spuds trashed like gremlins had been fed after midnight... literally bits of spud from dining room up to bathroom. (w00t)

she's had the laces out of virtually every shoe and trainer to the point where her poo comes out on strings tied together :lol:

she crapped tinfoil for a week once and we definitely hadn't fed her any (w00t)

aaannnnddd.....the bitch decided we probably kept bones under our mattress...yes our lovely expensive hand made mattress...so she dug a sodding great big hole in it just to check.... and when we came home and found her sitting on the bed with a gob full of stuffing..all we got was a look that said " Well you might have!" she then hooted indignantly and got off the bed and huffed her way down the stairs! :lol:
 
Whippets Rule said:
midlanderkeith said:
PMSL, who needs tv with posts like this, ang on a min tho, its footy on tv innit, Holland n Russia, bugger it im stayin put :lol:
Click to expand...

stop it she doesn't need encouragement (w00t) she torments my rabbits with her attempts to suck them through the bars on the run like some giant hairy vacuum cleaner. :lol:

we've come home to a mess as though a chef has had a seizure in the middle of my kitchen, whilst cooking a casserole....ie veg, meat, gravy granules...everywhere including up the walls...a whole bag of spuds trashed like gremlins had been fed after midnight... literally bits of spud from dining room up to bathroom. (w00t)

she's had the laces out of virtually every shoe and trainer to the point where her poo comes out on strings tied together :lol:

she crapped tinfoil for a week once and we definitely hadn't fed her any (w00t)

aaannnnddd.....the bitch decided we probably kept bones under our mattress...yes our lovely expensive hand made mattress...so she dug a sodding great big hole in it just to check.... and when we came home and found her sitting on the bed with a gob full of stuffing..all we got was a look that said " Well you might have!" she then hooted indignantly and got off the bed and huffed her way down the stairs! :lol:

Click to expand...
ROFLMBO, :cheers:
 
pmsl (w00t) sorry but jessie the resident destuffer has now got an angelic look about her (w00t)
 
She's lovely, like my boxer Chloe, a face only a

mother could love :lol:
 
(w00t) (w00t) she sounds lovely...and im sure you wouldnt have her any other way...... well maybe just abit :- "
 
keep threatening to hit her with a shovel but when i look it seems someone has beaten me to it (w00t) (w00t) :lol: :lol:

if i'm sitting down she will flop down next to me BUT if she is sitting down and i have the cheek to sit next to her she moo's loudly and stalks out of the room, pausing at the doorway to look me up and down and ask " who let you in?"

if she is near you and you have the audacity to move your feet she lets out a yell and goes flying from the room with all her hackles up! (w00t)

she has half a dozen squeaky toys and she shoves them under the sofa with her paws. she proceeds to whine and moo and swear at you until you lift the sofa and retrieve them all.....she then shoves them back under as far as she can..THEN she looks at you and curses and says " oh for god sake look what you've gone and made me do!!!" :lol: she even rolls her eyes at you!

when we lead walk her it's like taking a baby troll for a walk...she complains and grumbles the whole time (wearing her Hannibal Lecter mask)she salivates and farts and tries to grab small children and old ladies as they pass.

She produces the largest pile of steaming green poo in the middle of zebra crossings and then looks at you as if to say "God i can't take you anywhere!" then while you hurry to clean it up she starts gurning at the drivers of the cars waiting for you to cross. (w00t)

i love her very much but sometimes she is a loathsome creature :lol:
 
Whippets Rule said:
keep threatening to hit her with a shovel but when i look it seems someone has beaten me to it (w00t)   (w00t)   :lol:   :lol:
if i'm sitting down she will flop down next to me BUT if she is sitting down and i have the cheek to sit next to her she moo's loudly and stalks out of the room, pausing at the doorway to look me up and down and ask " who let you in?"

if she is near you and you have the audacity to move your feet she lets out a yell and goes flying from the room with all her hackles up! (w00t)

she has half a dozen squeaky toys and she shoves them under the sofa with her paws. she proceeds to whine and moo and swear at you until you lift the sofa and retrieve them all.....she then shoves them back under as far as she can..THEN she looks at you and curses and says " oh for god sake look what you've gone and made me do!!!" :lol: she even rolls her eyes at you!

when we lead walk her it's like taking a baby troll for a walk...she complains and grumbles the whole time (wearing her Hannibal Lecter mask)she salivates and farts and tries to grab small children and old ladies as they pass.

She produces the largest pile of steaming green poo in the middle of zebra crossings and then looks at you as if to say "God i can't take you anywhere!" then while you hurry to clean it up she starts gurning at the drivers of the cars waiting for you to cross. (w00t)

i love her very much but sometimes she is a loathsome creature :lol:

Click to expand...
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Whippets Rule said:
keep threatening to hit her with a shovel but when i look it seems someone has beaten me to it (w00t)   (w00t)   :lol:   :lol:
if i'm sitting down she will flop down next to me BUT if she is sitting down and i have the cheek to sit next to her she moo's loudly and stalks out of the room, pausing at the doorway to look me up and down and ask " who let you in?"

if she is near you and you have the audacity to move your feet she lets out a yell and goes flying from the room with all her hackles up! (w00t)

she has half a dozen squeaky toys and she shoves them under the sofa with her paws. she proceeds to whine and moo and swear at you until you lift the sofa and retrieve them all.....she then shoves them back under as far as she can..THEN she looks at you and curses and says " oh for god sake look what you've gone and made me do!!!" :lol: she even rolls her eyes at you!

when we lead walk her it's like taking a baby troll for a walk...she complains and grumbles the whole time (wearing her Hannibal Lecter mask)she salivates and farts and tries to grab small children and old ladies as they pass.

She produces the largest pile of steaming green poo in the middle of zebra crossings and then looks at you as if to say "God i can't take you anywhere!" then while you hurry to clean it up she starts gurning at the drivers of the cars waiting for you to cross. (w00t)

i love her very much but sometimes she is a loathsome creature :lol:

Click to expand...
Hit it with a shovel, pmsl, in fact ive not laughed as much in a long time, even my ladies on the deck, i wunna sleep tonight

nice one :cheers:
 
midlanderkeith said:
Whippets Rule said:
keep threatening to hit her with a shovel but when i look it seems someone has beaten me to it (w00t)   (w00t)   :lol:   :lol:
if i'm sitting down she will flop down next to me BUT if she is sitting down and i have the cheek to sit next to her she moo's loudly and stalks out of the room, pausing at the doorway to look me up and down and ask " who let you in?"

if she is near you and you have the audacity to move your feet she lets out a yell and goes flying from the room with all her hackles up! (w00t)

she has half a dozen squeaky toys and she shoves them under the sofa with her paws. she proceeds to whine and moo and swear at you until you lift the sofa and retrieve them all.....she then shoves them back under as far as she can..THEN she looks at you and curses and says " oh for god sake look what you've gone and made me do!!!" :lol: she even rolls her eyes at you!

when we lead walk her it's like taking a baby troll for a walk...she complains and grumbles the whole time (wearing her Hannibal Lecter mask)she salivates and farts and tries to grab small children and old ladies as they pass.

She produces the largest pile of steaming green poo in the middle of zebra crossings and then looks at you as if to say "God i can't take you anywhere!" then while you hurry to clean it up she starts gurning at the drivers of the cars waiting for you to cross. (w00t)

i love her very much but sometimes she is a loathsome creature :lol:

Click to expand...
Hit it with a shovel, pmsl, in fact ive not laughed as much in a long time, even my ladies on the deck, i wunna sleep tonight

nice one :cheers:

Click to expand...
yeh, still pmsl
 
(w00t) (w00t) (w00t) (w00t)

Don't you wanna just kiss her on the snoz.
 
Schmick said:
(w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)
Don't you wanna just kiss her on the snoz.

Click to expand...
Beautiful as I think she is Graeme...NO! Boxers have a tendancy to snort as soon as you get near their muzzles :lol: :lol: (w00t) (w00t)
 
meddling said:
Schmick said:
(w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)
Don't you wanna just kiss her on the snoz.

Click to expand...
Beautiful as I think she is Graeme...NO! Boxers have a tendancy to snort as soon as you get near their muzzles :lol: :lol: (w00t) (w00t)

Click to expand...


oohh come on, be game.

How could you resist that big beautiful snoz :wub: :wub: :wub:
 
Schmick said:
meddling said:
Schmick said:
(w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)   (w00t)
Don't you wanna just kiss her on the snoz.

Click to expand...
Beautiful as I think she is Graeme...NO! Boxers have a tendancy to snort as soon as you get near their muzzles :lol: :lol: (w00t) (w00t)

Click to expand...


oohh come on, be game.

How could you resist that big beautiful snoz :wub: :wub: :wub:

Click to expand...
Believe me - I had Boxers for years and got many a 'snotting' off them!!! :x :lol: :lol:
 
(w00t) the baboon on Lsd has been out snuffling for squirrels this morning in the woods!

it trolled through the woods like a thing possessed, although all the slathering and snorting simply warned all wild life within a five mile radius that the monkey bitch was have its morning walk!

we saw one dog walker and their collie.....i believe the owner may still be trying to get their dog out of the upper branches of a tree as i type (w00t) (w00t)

we came back home with the ugly thing poking it's head out of the car window,she nearly slapped herself to death as her lips blew in the wind, BUT no such luck it still lives! (w00t)

one side of the car is streaked with saliva and a cyclist we passed got a nasty face full too :lol:

it's now lying on its back with it's legs all floppy snoring like an over weight pensioner after a big meal (w00t)
 
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